For the past two months, one of my friends has been telling me all about the Princess Jasmine costume she’s planning on wearing for Halloween. She’s been hinting about this costume, teasing about this costume, to the point where everyone who knows about this costume is anxiously awaiting its arrival. She also happens to be ridiculously attractive, making the whole getup that much more appealing. At the same time, all this anticipation has kept the idea of All Hallows’ Eve fresh in my mind.
Halloween costumes are never an easy thing. October 31st seems to sneak up on you every year. Without proper preparation, you end up dressed as a hobo, a monster, or Dracula, all of which are ill-advised counterparts to the Princess Jasmines of the world.
That’s why I’m here to help. I’ve come up with 11 costume ideas you might find useful. As a Seattle sports fan, most of these should resonate with you. And if you manage to pull any of these looks off, you’ll be more successful at your Halloween party than any of our teams have been in 2011.
So without further ado, let’s get in the holiday spirit and start the trick or treating…
According to police reports, former University of Washington basketball player Venoy Overton is a pimp. An alleged pimp, I should say. I mean, we already knew he was a pimp in the figurative sense long ago. But now he’s allegedly a real pimp. That would be allegedly hilarious if it wasn’t so allegedly unfortunate. Chances are, however, you’ve already found the hilarity in the situation and made a few jokes behind closed doors. It is what it is. Don’t feel bad about it.
We can all admit that Venoy has f**ked up pretty badly. Whether you’re a Husky fan or not is irrelevant. Getting caught pimping hos is never a good thing. This is just a reality of the world we live in.
On top of that, sympathy for the ex-Dawg has all but run out. No one gives a sh*t about Venoy Overton anymore, and that’s too bad. Not because I’m advocating compassion for the guy. But because it’s pretty damn sad that people will remember him as a bad individual.
Is love having a girlfriend that will perform sex acts on other people for money, then perform those same sex acts on you for free?
Is love the confidence that you can set your dove free, out into the world, out to explore the nether reaches of other gentlemen, knowing full well that she’ll return to you with exactly the same passion and exuberance she once departed with?
Could love be the sharing of finances? Finances that have been garnered through any means necessary, out of adoration for the other soul in your life. Finances handed over for the sake of the relationship, for the better of both of you. Finances that won’t just pay the bills, or put food on the table, or raise the kids, but also serve as a beautiful metaphor for two hearts beating as one.
Is love hanging out with one of your closest friends, having a conversation about life, knowing you’re baring all your emotions to this life-long confidant of yours, all while two willing females massage your respective genitalia with their mouths?
With all due respect to the Marquette Golden Eagles, I truly believe the Washington Huskies will pull the upset and win their first round NCAA Tournament matchup on Thursday. You can call it blind allegiance if you must, but if I were a betting man I’d still side with the Dawgs. It just makes sense. Here’s why:
A bunch of swingmen vs. Matthew Bryan-Amaning
Had you told me a month ago that Matthew Bryan-Amaning would be our biggest X-factor in the first round of the NCAA Tournament, I would have cringed. These days, however, he might very well be our greatest weapon.
The 6’9″ power forward from Britain will be counted on to shoulder much of the load inside against Marquette’s diminutive front line. Though the Golden Eagles’ forwards are all at least two inches shorter than MBA, they play bigger than their stature and are more active than some of the big bodies the Huskies faced in Pac-10 play.
It’s a case that has been trumpeted by fans and media alike for weeks now. Simply put, people want to see Venoy Overton as a starter on the Husky men’s basketball team.
You can probably blame Eldridge Recasner for sparking this debate.
The former UW and NBA point guard has been calling for the 5’11” junior to get the nod over freshman incumbent Abdul Gaddy since the non-conference season, citing Overton’s defense and energy as two big factors in his potential promotion. Recasner, a contributor on 950 KJR’s weekly Husky Honks show, has continued to make the case for Overton every Wednesday. That’s dedication.
Venoy Overton is the man. Did you see what happened to him during the Arizona State game? He got accosted by ASU’s James Harden, then assaulted in the testicles by Harden’s teammate Derek Glasser (which, we can assume, isn’t the first time Glasser has touched another man’s balls), and somehow managed to come out of it alive and capable of showing off the Washington “W” with his fingers (and no, angry white folk, that’s not a gang sign).
Venoy is straight gangster, and I mean that in the best possible way. He’s relentless on defense, hounds opposing players all game long, gets in the other team’s head, and has his motor running 100% for all 40 minutes. It’s exactly how you would want to see the game played.
On top of all that, we tend to overlook the fact that Venoy was a starter last season, and has handled his transition to the bench with remarkable class. Unlike many star players who might pout or lament their reduced role, Venoy has seemingly embraced it, becoming one of college basketball’s premier sixth men. And yes, I did say “star.” Let’s not sell the man short, now.