Tag Archives: Thunder

Hey, Oklahoma City: Can you stop being passive-aggressive jerkoffs now?

sonics-fans-6df4c655b796c3beBelow is a response to a letter penned to Seattle by The Oklahoman columnist Jenni Carlson. Read at your own risk.

Dear Oklahoma City,

Truce? I don’t think so.

Here in Seattle, we’ve been watching your basketball team and its slobber-knocking run to an inevitable playoff ouster.  We see the joy our former Sonics have created. We see the passion your fans have for this championship-losing bound bunch. We see the arm-waving, cousin-banging Thunder-up insanity of it all.

And we wonder if it’s time you went and fucked yourselves.

You’ve got a great, albeit unaccomplished basketball team.

We’ve got a great football team.

Can we all just agree that you’ll go fuck yourselves?

Sure, there will probably always be some people in Oklahoma City who want to get along with Seattle because they need validation and have a strong desire to be liked and accepted by all of society. They watched a couple years ago when the Thunder lost in the NBA Finals and felt that a future of fateful title defeats might be avoided if a bit of good karma was extended the Pacific Northwest’s way.

Continue reading Hey, Oklahoma City: Can you stop being passive-aggressive jerkoffs now?

Let’s Hear It For The 2012 NBA Runner-Up Oklahoma City Thunder!

Seriously. Heckuva season. No shame in almost winning it all. Lots of people to acknowledge here, so let’s not waste any time.

First off, congratulations to Clay Bennett and Aubrey McClendon, owners of the coveted second-place trophy. That’s fantastic.

Second, to my man Brian Davis, former Seattleite and employee of Fox Sports Northwest who left to become Oklahoma City’s play-by-play guy — stay true, Big Dawg.

Third, to all the players who tried really hard: good effort, good job.

Fourth, shout out to the kids in Africa rockin’ the 2012 Oklahoma City Thunder NBA Championship gear. Enjoy that shit.

And finally, to all the fans out there who don’t know what it feels like to win a title, I give you this:

That’s how it’s done.

Thank you, Miami Heat.

Go Sonics.

Give us our team back, David Stern.