Tag Archives: New Orleans Hornets

An Open Plea To Steve Ballmer

Dear Steve,

As you already know, we need a professional basketball team in this city. Ours was stolen from us like a pair of kicks from Foot Locker. This is where you come in.

Now as you may have heard, the NBA is seizing the New Orleans Hornets franchise, as their owner is basically a delinquent malcontent (okay, malcontent is a little strong of a word, but you get the point). The league is more or less foreclosing on the organization, looking to flip it at a discounted rate to the highest bidder. Being one of the richest men in the world, you’re as ideal a candidate as any to own this basketball team.

Of course, there’s the matter of an arena. I actually feel kind of bad asking this of you, but do you think you could go ahead and foot the bill for a state-of-the-art venue in the Greater Seattle area? Because that’s what it will really take to land the Hornets here in the Emerald City. The cost of the team is petty cash. It’s the new multi-purpose facility that will really set you back.

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Here’s A Really Unique View On The Sonics For Your Enjoyment

I received a great letter the other day from a loyal reader by the name of Patrick. Patrick wanted to talk about the Sonics and the possibility that the New Orleans Hornets could conceivably become the Sonics at some point in the future. And so he did.

I enjoyed Patrick’s letter enough that I feel compelled to reprint it on these pages and share with you my thoughts on the matter simultaneously. It will be like a back and forth. This should be both fun and exotic. Let’s give it a try (Patrick’s comments in italics, mine in bold).


With all this wild-ass speculation of [Steve] Ballmer as a candidate to buy the NO Hornets, I went off and had my own little mind-trip of what I would do if I had $5 billion or whatever he just came up with when he sold all that stock.
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Playing with ESPN’s NBA Trade Machine

kevindurantadammorrisonYes, it’s that time of year again.  The time when ESPN  proudly displays their greatest invention, the NBA Trade Machine, for all us laypeople to experiment with.  If you’ve never fooled around with the NBATM before, CLICK HERE to get started.  Basically, the trade machine allows you to incorporate up to three NBA teams and begin trading players amongst the teams, taking into account the salary cap and other factors that would influence real-life deals.  Here are some trades I’ve worked out already today.

Trade #1:

Los Angeles Lakers get: Tyson Chandler, Mouhamed Sene, Kyle Weaver, Nick Collison, Earl Watson, Russ Westbrook, and Damien Wilkens.

Oklahoma City Thunder get: Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol.

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