Tag Archives: Mel Kiper

Top 11: Things Mel Kiper can do now that the NFL Draft is complete

melkiperjrThe 2009 NFL Draft is fin, meaning Mel Kiper, Jr. has nothing to do. So we’ve gone ahead and come up with a list of 11 activities MKJ can undertake during his offseason in this week’s bonus Top 11.

11. Put together Mel Kiper’s Scripps National Spelling Bee Big Board. Because somebody’s gotta do it. And a quick reminder, Bee Week kicks off May 26.

10. Go back to plotting the hit on Todd McShay. The younger, more knowledgeable, better looking, less annoying version of Kiper is quietly becoming ESPN’s go-to guy when it comes to analysis on the NFL Draft. Think of McShay as Tim Kurkjian, to Kiper’s Peter Gammons.

9. Return to Safeway for his offseason job. “Mel Kiper, clean up on aisle seven…Kiper to aisle seven. Thank you.”

8. Get Lasik surgery to eliminate the perpetual squint. Contrary to popular belief, Mel Kiper is not Chinese.

Continue reading Top 11: Things Mel Kiper can do now that the NFL Draft is complete

Welcome To Mel Kiper’s Nightmare

nfldraftIt’s NFL Draft Day, 2009. The day Mel Kiper, Jr. is proven wrong for hours on end.

Not unlike a Hawaiian meteorologist awaking to a pounding rainstorm, Kiper is forced to sit idly by and witness all his projections go down the crapper as teams metaphorically kick him in the nutsack by selecting players that ESPN’s resident draft guru never saw coming.

Yes, it’s kind of like that.

Enjoy the day. Go Hawks!