Tag Archives: Brad Miller

What’s Up With The Mariners’ Weird Hand Gestures?

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If you’ve watched enough Mariners baseball this year, you’ve likely seen it. It starts with a base hit, then segues into a ritualistic celebration of sorts. An M’s hitter will stand perched atop the bag after a single, double, or triple, look towards the dugout, raise each semi-closed fist above his noggin, then move those fists side to side as his teammates sheltered along the baseline respond. But what does it all mean?

The move itself is one I like to call the “Double-Sack Dance.” It has origins in pornography (where all good things find their beginning), but has been popularized in mainstream movies, as well – most notably a scene in Superbad, among other works of fine film:

DoubleHJ

As you can see above, Jonah Hill might very well be to blame for bringing a variation of the Double-Sack Dance to the public spectrum.

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The 2014 Seattle Mariners Experience: Weeks 5-7 – Goodbye, Ineptitude

201405181540564464123For the Week 4 recap, click here.

Week 5

Week’s Win-Loss Record: 4-1

Overall Win-Loss Record: 14-15

Winning Percentage: .483

Division Standing: Fourth place

Week’s Opponents: New York Yankees (2 games) – Road; Houston Astros (3 games) – Road

Playoff Status: Not mathematically eliminated

Team Morale: Buoyant

***

Week 6

Week’s Win-Loss Record: 5-3

Overall Win-Loss Record: 19-18

Winning Percentage: .514

Division Standing: Third place

Week’s Opponents: Oakland Athletics (4 games) – Road; Kansas City Royals (4 games) – Home

Playoff Status: Not mathematically eliminated

Team Morale: Fabulous

***

Week 7

Week’s Win-Loss Record: 2-4

Overall Win-Loss Record: 21-22

Winning Percentage: .488

Division Standing: Third place, 6.5 games back

Week’s Opponents: Tampa Bay Rays (3 games) – Home; Minnesota Twins (3 games) – Road

Playoff Status: Not mathematically eliminated

Team Morale: Bipolar

Since the last time I penned a recap column, the Mariners have somehow cobbled together a record of 11-8, meaning they don’t suck nearly as much as they did before. At a single game under .500, the ballclub has been very nearly the definition of average despite serious mood swings in achieving their current level of mediocrity.

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What The Hell Was That? Dissecting a Mariners Meltdown

Dumpster-FireLloyd McClendon emerged from the depths of Globe Life Park’s third base dugout and strode purposefully across the playing field. As they so often do when McClendon visits his pitcher, the entire Seattle infield converged upon the mound and their suddenly-embattled closer, Fernando Rodney.

Having recorded a pair of quick outs to the first two batters he faced in the bottom of the ninth, Rodney appeared on the verge of his fourth save of the season. But then the 37-year-old right-hander relinquished a single up the middle to Texas third baseman Kevin Kouzmanoff. Minutes later, Rodney issued a walk to designated hitter Mitch Moreland. The tying run moved into scoring position. The winning run stood perched on first base. McClendon got up.

In all likelihood, the team’s first-year manager probably reminded his players that they needed just one more out to secure a victory, that they had a force available at any base, and that this was their game to win. But based on the events that immediately followed the brief get-together, McClendon may very well have said something along the lines of, “Guys, let’s do everything we can to fuck this up as spectacularly as possible.”

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The 2014 Seattle Mariners Experience: Week 1

canoYou don’t want to read about the Mariners every single day. It’s not good for your health. For the same reasons, no one really wants to write about the Mariners every single day, either. Frankly, if someone were to chronicle their thoughts on the M’s on a repeating 24-hour basis, the log of emotions would read like a crazy person’s diary. For evidence of this, go scour my Twitter account at any point in time.

To combat the daily bipolarity of the baseball team you and I choose to both love and hate, we here at Seattle Sportsnet have decided to bring you a comprehensive week-to-week recap of the 2014 Mariners experience, which in itself is sure to be a roller coaster ride of emotional proportions. While we’ll fill the remaining days of each week with more pointed discussion of the M’s – trade suggestions, Hector Noesi minor league updates, Top 11 lists, half-brained promotional ideas, et cetera – you can count on this weekly look at the team to quench your thirst for all things Seattle baseball.

Without further introduction, let’s get to the update.

Week 1

Win-Loss Record: 4-2

Winning Percentage: .667

Division Standing: First place

Week’s Opponents: Los Angeles Angels (3 games) – Road; Oakland Athletics (3 games) – Road

Playoff Status: Not mathematically eliminated

Team Morale: Decent

What the hell is going on? That’s a question many of us were asking ourselves on Wednesday evening, shortly after the Mariners completed a season-opening three-game sweep of the Angels. The Angels were supposed to be okay. The M’s were supposed to be less than okay. All things considered, a trio of wins for the boys in blue was wholly unanticipated.

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