Remember 2010? It will forever be etched in time as the Seattle Mariners’ “Believe Big” year. Believing big didn’t really work out the way everyone hoped, but the optimism was warranted. Coming off a promising 2009 campaign in which the team posted an 85-77 win-loss mark, the ’09-’10 offseason was full of giddiness and excitement.
Neglecting the various warts in a lineup pockmarked by over-performers and aging veterans, the M’s front office pulled off two major moves that offseason. The first came on December 8th, 2009 in the form of diminutive free agent infielder Chone Figgins. The Mariners inked Figgins to a (ugh) four-year contract that day, then waited just eight more days before pulling off their next big move. On December 16th, the team acquired starting pitcher Cliff Lee from Philadelphia for a hodgepodge of middling prospects. The move was heralded as a franchise-changer, the type that would take the organization from okay to great. With Lee and Felix Hernandez, the Mariners would be unstoppable. Never mind the fact that, assuming both aces stayed healthy, the duo would appear in just 40-percent of the team’s games. This was it! This was the Mariners’ year!
Continue reading Believe in Moderation
In 2010, the Mariners asked you to Believe Big. You did as told. And you were betrayed.
So what do they have in store for you in 2011? Hopefully something more honest, something more straightforward. That’s where we come in.
Whether or not the team chooses to employ any of these suggestions for 2011 is irrelevant. All 11 of these catch-phrases are not only unique, they’re apt. That’s right. Apt. Meaning spot-on, truthful, correctly utilized.
Without further ado, we present to you the Top 11 2011 Seattle Mariners Team Slogans. Because we aren’t all blessed with a job in marketing.
11. Chicks Dig The Ground Ball
Which totally explains why most members of our team are still getting laid.
Pitching, hitting, doesn’t matter. We are a ground ball MACHINE!
10. Twenty-percent of the time, we win every time.
Continue reading Top 11: 2011 Seattle Mariners Team Slogans
In honor of the 2010 Seattle Mariners, we’re bringing you this list of the 40 Most Overrated Things In The History of the World. Why 40, you ask? Because round numbers are overrated.
Keep in mind that by determining the following things to be “overrated,” we aren’t saying that they’re bad in any way. Each of these 40 letdowns is simply unable to live up to the lofty status imposed upon it by society. Thems the breaks.
So without further ado, please sit back, relax, and, like your 2010 Mariners, Believe Big!
40. Farmers markets
Do you really want to hang out with people who don’t shower and pay more for their sh*t than those of us who shop at the grocery store?
39. Facebook chat
This thing was supposed to replace AOL Instant Messenger (AIM, to the initiated) and Gmail Chat (Gchat). Instead, it’s like the Matterhorn at Disneyland: great when it’s fully functional, but rarely in proper working order.
Continue reading Believe Big! The 40 Most Overrated Things in the History of the World