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Some Facts About Alvin Davis, Friend Of Elves

I don’t care what anybody says. Alvin Davis is one of the greatest baseball players in the history of the world. Just look at that ‘stache. If it doesn’t exude power and prominence, I don’t know what does.

In 1984, Alvin won the American League Rookie of the Year award. In October of that year, I was born. Alvin willed my parents to have me.

Alvin hit home runs in each of his first two major league games that season. He finished the year with 27 longballs and 116 runs batted in. He even made the freakin’ All-Star team. That’s Alvin Davis, for you. Not just one star. All of them.

Alvin was blessed with a name like Alvin, which is synonymous with greatness and chipmunks. Think of anyone named Alvin who did greater things than Alvin Davis. You can’t. Because there isn’t anyone. Alvin Davis is the greatest Alvin that ever lived.

On a side note, the meaning of the name “Alvin” is “friend of elves”. So if you’re an elf, just know you have a friend. In Alvin.

Alvin played first base, which everyone knows is the best base, because it’s first.

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