You want to call a sports radio station but you need help. Thankfully, you’ve got me. I’m an expert on this sort of thing. Not because I call sports radio stations myself. But because I listen. And listening, as any girl will tell you, is the key.
That’s why I’ve created this step-by-step guide to helping you make that all-important call to voice your opinion on something that, frankly, most people probably don’t care about it. But that’s beside the point. The point is, you’ve been dying to pick up that phone and hear your voice on the airwaves. I’m here to make it easier for you. Let’s go.
Step 1: Tell the call screener that he/she has a sexy voice.
It doesn’t hurt to butter up the person in charge of putting you through to the host. “Hey sexy, you sound hot,” should suffice. In this day and age, it doesn’t really matter if this person is of the opposite gender or not. Most attractive people with sexy voices are used to both homo- and heterosexual attention. Just let it rip. You’ll see immediate results.
For added effect, breathe heavily.
Continue reading Your 7-Step Guide To Calling A Sports Radio Station
As loyal readers of Seattle Sportsnet, you have a right to be informed. Which is why I’m here to tell you that it’s on. Next Tuesday night. 8:00 p.m. What’s on, you ask? Karate Emergency.
I should probably italicize that since it’s the name of a production. Karate Emergency. There. Now it’s official. Let me tell you something. You know you’ve made it when you can italicize the name of something that you’ve created. I don’t even italicize Seattle Sportsnet, so you know how important Karate Emergency is. Parents don’t even italicize the names of their children. So it’s even more important than that. We’re bigger than life itself. Think about that. It’s deep.
Karate Emergency. It’s the name of our goofy-ass podcast radio show. Endorsed (however loosely) by Sports Radio 950 KJR, recorded in a real-life studio, broadcast to the ears of millions, and made just for you, the Seattle sports fanatic.
That’s what this show is destined to be. An outlet for the local sports fan. Think of Seattle Sportsnet on radio, with three more people, wittier banter, and an Almost Live! feel to it. That’s what we’re trying to make Karate Emergency out to be. And it’s gonna be fantastic.
Continue reading What Is Karate Emergency?
Shameless self-promotion, I know. Not that anyone should have any shame in promoting themselves. Screw that. From now on, I’m calling it Super Fun Self-Promotion. The connotation is decisively positive. And we’re having Super Fun, which is always a good thing. So consider this Super Fun Self-Promotion and not shameless. Win.
Continue reading Reminder: Listen To 950 KJR Today At 1:20 PM!
One, if you haven’t made plans to attend The Athletic Supporters Basketball Showcase this evening, I highly recommend this opportunity for free entertainment (click here for details). It’s not every day that you get to watch a bunch of grown men run around in shorts and tank tops trying to rekindle their glory years. It should be a lot of fun for everyone.
Two, on Wednesday I will be appearing on 950 KJR AM with Ian Furness at 1:20 p.m. for a social media roundtable. Joining me will be Ryan Divish from the Tacoma News-Tribune, Chris Fetters from Dawgman.com, and Jason Churchill from ProspectInsider.com and ESPN. We will be broadcasting live from Dino’s Pub in North Renton (across the freeway from the Seahawks’ practice facility), so stop by if you get a chance.
Continue reading Two Programming Notes
To view this public event on Facebook, please click here.
The Athletic Supporters are arguably the greatest recreational sports franchise in the history of the world, if not the entire universe. If you haven’t yet learned of their greatness, please go to the following audio clip and scroll to the 2-minute mark, followed shortly thereafter by the 11-minute mark: http://bit.ly/c8ibF6
Don’t act like you’re not impressed. The Athletic Supporters’ fame — nay, infamy — has reached the airwaves of mass media. Are they America’s team? Some would say yes, they are. If nothing else, they’re the Greater Seattle Metro Area and Surrounding Suburbs’ team. Indubitably.
Continue reading It’s A Party! And Everyone’s Invited!
He is the most underrated play-by-play man in the Lower Queen Anne neighborhood.
His name is Dick Fain.
He used to be Softy’s sidekick on 950 KJR, until they gave him the axe, even though I wrote to program director Rich Moore and told him they needed to keep Dick around.
He is an assistant boys’ basketball coach at Mount Rainier High School in Des Moines.
He can make his voice climb three or four octaves when talking about Sue Bird.
Sometimes, he screams.
He is well-coiffed. He probably uses L.A. Looks on that scalp.
The second Google entry when you search for the term “dick fain” reveals a post from this website.
Continue reading The Legacy of Dick Fain
We all say things that, when taken out of context, are hilarious. Most of us don’t say those things on the radio, however.
That’s what makes Ashley Ryan special. Not only does she say things that will make you giggle, but she does so unintentionally in front of thousands of listeners.
For those of you who don’t know Ashley, she comes to you live each and every weekday from the State Farm Traffic Center. You might hear her on various ClearChannel stations throughout your radio dial, but she’s arguably most famous for her work with Sports Radio 950 KJR.
That’s where this audio clip comes to us from. I just happened to be tuned in on Wednesday afternoon when Ashley uttered the sentence you just heard in the sound bite. In context, she was speaking directly to my good friend Josh, who was reading a lengthy list of guests scheduled to join host Jason Puckett for the afternoon show. Out of context, she had a Grade-A “That’s what she said” moment.
Continue reading Ashley Ryan Wins The Week