Category Archives: Top 11

Top 11: Unheralded Northwest Rivalries

Credit Ian Furness with providing the inspiration for this article. The afternoon radio host on 950 KJR wanted to know what the best rivalry in the Northwest was. There are any number of answers to this question, none right, none wrong. But undoubtedly, there are rivalries that are often overlooked. We present those to you in this week’s Top 11.

Because there’s more to life than just Huskies versus Cougars.

11. Ichiro Suzuki vs. The English Language

Like a coy zen master, Ichiro manipulates the English language with the calculated finesse of a rock gardener over his rock garden. Sometimes he speaks it, sometimes he doesn’t. Just depends on the chi of Ichiro at that precise moment.

One thing that remains true is that for eight years now, the Mariners have employed a translator at Ichiro’s behest. The rumor is that the M’s right fielder chooses to utilize his English-speaking mouthpiece so as not to look foolish in the public eye or be misquoted. Okay.

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Top 11: Things To Do In Your Very Own Silverdome

Once upon a time, the Pontiac Silverdome was the home of the NFL’s Detroit Lions and the NBA’s Detroit Pistons. Built in 1975 in the midst of America’s dome frenzy era, the Silverdome was constructed at a cost of $55,000,000 (or roughly $220,000,000 in today’s economy). This past Monday, the 127 acre plot of land along with its dilapidated arena was sold to a Canadian investment firm for $583,000. Yes, that’s thousands of dollars, not millions.

I know what you’re thinking right now. You’re thinking, “How in the hell did I let this opportunity pass me by?” There are literally millions of Americans out there that could have purchased the Silverdome and done whatever they wanted with it. It costs slightly more than the median home price in many cities across the U.S. And frankly, why have a home when you can have a dome?

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Top 11: NBA All-Ugly Team (With Pictures)

buttuglyThe NBA season is underway and you know what that means. Time to determine the ugliest players in the league.

I know what you’re thinking: That’s not very nice of you to pick on the uglies. Well frankly, you’re right. But the way we see it, a lot of these homely fellows do this to themselves. They over-tat their canvas of a body, they fail to get their hair cut adequately, they refuse to shave, things like that. And if that doesn’t sway you, these guys are making millions of dollars to play a game, so there.

We’ve divided this list into three segments. Nos. 11-7 are the All-Ugly Second Team. Nos. 6-2 are the All-Ugly First Team. And of course No. 1 is the All-Ugly MVP.

For the record, we considered calling this the All-Brooke Hundley Team, but we figured some of you might not get the reference. Oh well.

On to the list!

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Top 11: Greatest Sports Related Halloween Costumes Ever

7. Also the number of mistresses Lance has.
7. Also the number of mistresses Lance has.

You’re a sports fan who loves Halloween. And let’s face it, how many of us don’t love Halloween?

As a kid, you get to dress up as your favorite superhero for an evening, then go take candy from every house in the neighborhood. Fantastic.

As an adult, you get to drink, party, and watch slutty chicks dress up in skimpy clothing and forgo all their inhibitions simply because they’re in costume. Also fantastic.

So how are you going to make this Halloween the very best Halloween?

Answer: By dressing up in one of these 11 unique sports-related ensembles. Because you can only be a hobo for so long before it gets old.

On to the list.

11. Lance Armstrong’s last sperm

I’ve been pondering this costume idea for a number of years now. It’s a low-cost, low-maintenance outfit that really only requires toilet paper and a quick wit.

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Top 11: Signs Your Fantasy Football Team Sucks

Have you seen this man? Neither have I.
Have you seen this man? Neither have I.

In this era of fantasy athletics, there are always going to be fantasy winners and fantasy losers. You strive to be a winner, but more often than not you lose. And you don’t know why.

Lucky for you, we’ve got your answers.

From sleepers to sure-things, we all make mistakes. The first step towards success is admitting we’ve made mistakes, correcting those mistakes, and moving forward from those mistakes.

Nobody is perfect and we all have our flaws. Together, we can overcome just about anything. Even Tarvaris Jackson.

On to the list…

11. Your sleepers are still sleeping

The “experts” told you to take chances on guys like Josh Morgan, Derrick Ward, and Nate Washington. Whoops. Guess they were wrong.

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Top 11: Fantasy Football Players We Love To Hate

anthonygonzalez2Every year around this time, millions of Americans kick off fantasy football season. After months of scouting, drafting, adding, and dropping, all the blood, sweat, tears, and hand cramps that go along with preparing for a new year of fake football become absolutely worthwhile.

Amidst all the pomp and circumstance of the moment is a group of real-life football players that are seemingly brought to this earth to torment the fictional locker rooms of our made-up ballclubs. They may be superstars who absolutely murder the opposition, big-name Pro Bowl-types who can’t get it done on paper, or the projected fantasy studs that can’t step their game up.

No matter who they are, we all can agree that they are deserving of our hatred. Which is why we’ve narrowed the group down and present for your enjoyment a list of the Top 11 Fantasy Football Players We Love To Hate.

*Editor’s Note: This list only includes active NFL players. So sorry, Shaun Alexander, but you don’t qualify.

11. Anthony Gonzalez, WR, Indianapolis Colts

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Top 11: Best Intro Songs in Seattle Mariners History

hiphophoorayThe Mariners may not have won their first World Series yet, but they have had some important impacts on the game of baseball.

Perhaps their greatest contribution may be the advent of the intro song, a musical selection played in honor of each individual player’s appearance (most often affiliated with at-bats).

The M’s were one of the first franchises to regularly play music before each hitter’s at-bat. That unique aspect of the game quickly spread to other teams and other positions. These days, even pitchers have their own intro music and it is considered a rarity to take the field without a tune.

The Mariners promotional staff has been behind a number of great musical selections since 1993, when they first began playing intro songs. Using our way-back machine to relive the glory days, we’ve come up with a list of 11 of the best intro songs in team history, complete with music videos. Enjoy.

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Top 11: Signs To Bring To The LSU Game

airboatAdmit it, you’re struggling for ideas.

You need to come up with a killer poster to kick off the college football season, but your brain is still on summer vacation. Lucky for you, that’s where we come in.

Here at Seattle Sportsnet we’ve come up with 11 wonderful ideas for your hobby of sign-making. You’ve got the artistic talent, and we’ve got the homemade slogans tailor-made for the University of Washington’s inaugural opponent in 2009, LSU.

So get out your Sharpie and tagboard and start scribbling those bubble letters. Together, we can make this happen.


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Top 11: University of Oregon Pro Sports Busts

pitcrew1Disclaimer: This list is straight propaganda. If you’re a University of Oregon fan, you will absolutely hate it. If you’re an anti-Duck, it will probably bring a smile to your face. You’ve been warned.

Kick ’em while they’re up, that’s what I say. Just make sure if you’re gonna do it, you aim right for the testes.

No college athletics program is more up right now than the University of Oregon.

Their football team is everyone’s sexy pick to oust USC and win the Pac-10.

Their basketball team went as far as the Elite Eight just a few short years ago.

Their track program is one of the best in the nation.

And on top of all that, they just added a baseball team after more than two decades without one.

Yeah, I’d say the Ducks are flying high, which is why it’s time we bring them down a bit.

That’s why we’ve devoted an entire Top 11 to the pro sports busts who have emerged from the UO. It’s an impressive list, and one worthy of your time. If you hate Oregon, you’ll love this.

(For each entry, we have listed the player’s name, the league he was a part of, and the year he turned pro.)

11. Samie Parker, NFL, 2004

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Top 11: Things We Remember About PeeWee Sports

caprisunAh, the glory days. When men were boys, women were girls, and fun was endless. Before work consumed our daily lives, and paychecks weren’t our sole source of motivation. Back when grass stains were testaments of hard work, and a clean outfit meant you weren’t giving it your all.

For most of us, this is a trip down memory lane as we relive the Top 11 Things We Remember About PeeWee Sports. Now go rub some dirt on that paper cut.

11. Capri Sun

On a good day, the designated snack parent of the week would bring cans of Coke or bottles of Gatorade to the postgame smorgasbord.

Most days, however, you were stuck with Capri Sun.

The thing about Capri Sun is that it was the one drink kids could complain about (“Aww, mom, Capri Sun again?”) but still thoroughly enjoy. No matter that every flavor tasted the same.

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Top 11: Reasons The Mariners Can (Still) Win The AL West

Reason No. 9: Ian Snell
Reason No. 9: Ian Snell

I know what you’re thinking. There is no way — NO WAY! — the Mariners can make the playoffs. It’s over. Done. The fat lady is performing her encore.

But you’re wrong. You are flat wrong.

Not only is not over, but there is plenty of time left for the Mariners to climb up the standings and send shockwaves through all of Major League Baseball.

In 1995, the team was 13 games back in August and managed to overcome all odds to win the division.

These days, we’re still in July and the M’s are a mere 7.5 games behind those very same Angels that sat atop the West 14 years ago. Child’s play.

If you’re feeling a little pessimistic about the rest of the 2009 season, we’re here to provide you with 11 reasons why the Mariners can still win the AL West. Eleven. That’s a lot.

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Top 11: Ways To Improve The Seattle Sports Scene

mercerarenaEvery city has its problems and Seattle is no exception. From public spending to transportation and everything in between, the politics of these everyday issues make for no easy solutions.

But what about sports? We often tend to forget that sports are one of the most important components to a functioning municipality. We view sports as recreation, as a diversion from everyday life, when in reality sports help to create, fund, and maintain the everyday lives we lead.

From generating dollars and cents in the economy, to providing multi-purpose venues for public use, to building a sense of community, sports are an integral part of our city and require their own care and maintenance to thrive at a certain level.

It is on us, as citizens, to address areas in need of extra attention in all facets of our city, including sports. Hence, we’ve created a list of 11 ways that the Seattle sports scene can be improved. Your suggestions and additions are more than welcome, as well.

11. Do Something (Anything!) With Mercer Arena

There’s a good chance that many of you have no clue what Mercer Arena is, which just goes to show how irrelevant Seattle Center’s other arena has become.

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Top 11: Sports Rituals We Love To Hate

jumping circleBecause every sport has its annoying habitual routines that rub us the wrong way, we’ve created a list in tribute. Here are the Top 11 Sports Rituals We Love To Hate. Enjoy.

11. The Jumping Circle

What It Consists Of: A group of players celebrating by forming a circle and jumping up and down.

When It Occurs: Following a dramatic or unprecedented victory.

Why We Hate It: Simply put, it’s boring. There has to be some better way to celebrate than by forming an “O” and rhythmically hopping up and down like amateur moshers at a middle school dance.

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Top 11: Most Randomly Awesome Seattle Mariners Of All-Time

mikeschoolerYou know all about the greatest players in Seattle Mariners history: the Ken Griffeys, the Edgar Martinezes, the Jay Buhners, the Randy Johnsons, the Ichiros. You even know about the unsung heroes: Alvin Davis, Harold Reynolds, Mark Langston, Jamie Moyer, Dan Wilson, Tino Martinez, Omar Vizquel. You’re so well-versed in your M’s history that you even know the bad players: Bobby Ayala, Al Martin, Jeff Cirillo, Scott Spiezio. So what else is there to know?

How about the most randomly awesome players in team history? Guys who, for one reason or another, were beloved by fans for the strangest of reasons. Those honorable few who put together sub-par careers and hinted at mediocrity, yet still managed to hold down a roster spot for an extended period of time. Players who, had the M’s not spent years flirting with futility, may never have even put on a major league uniform.

The following 11 players may never be mentioned in the same breath as the greatest players of all-time, but mention just one of their names at a party and you’re sure to get a laugh or two from the crowd. On to the list.

11. Mike Schooler

A husky, hard-throwing right-hander with a porn ‘stache and a white man’s Jheri curl, Mike Schooler was the M’s closer back when the team hardly knew what a save was. Listed at 6’3″, 225 lbs, Schooler was an intimidating bullpen presence who famously entered games to the not-so-intimidating tune of School’s Out, by Alice Cooper.

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Top 11: Most Awesome Promotional Giveaways From When We Were Kids

1993 MOTHERS COOKIES MARINERS 4Call it a vintage SWAG list (Stuff We All Get). These days you’re more apt to see kids at the ballpark receive bobblehead dolls or tacky, cheap knick-knacks rather than the awesome SWAG we used to take home as youngsters back in the day.

That’s why we’ve come up with 11 of the greatest stadium promotional giveaways of our era and memorialized them in the following list. Like toys in Cracker Jack boxes or LPs on vinyl, they don’t make ’em like this anymore.

11. Team Trading Card Day

Kids today still receive baseball cards at the ballpark. But unlike yesteryear, the baseball cards of today are a mishmash of brands and ballplayers that are often presorted into sealed grab bags out of some dude’s collection.

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