Category Archives: Seahawks

Mr. Walsh’s Wild Ride

walshThere was no doubt in anyone’s mind that Blair Walsh would nail that kick.

It was a chip shot, a 27-yard attempt from the left hash, an absolute gimme.

The field goal would give the Vikings a two-point lead. The Seahawks would get the ball back with a little more than 20 seconds remaining in the contest. The Vikings might squib the ensuing kickoff, force the Hawks to field the football in the frigid cold, attempt a return, and take time off the clock. Or they might blast it to the back of the end zone for a touchback, as they had routinely been doing, in spite of the conditions. Either way, Russell Wilson wouldn’t have much time to lead the offense down the field in search of a victory.

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Karate Emergency Ep. 2.12: You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out


Slickhawk returns after a few days spent with a murderer, and the crew has lots to discuss.

The Huskies put a whooping on the Cougars in the Apple Cup, the Seahawks have more questions than answers in the wake of a critical injury, and Jerry Dipoto is out to save the Mariners by dealing everyone he comes in contact with.

On top of that, Kelly has a new meerkat, this one more famous than his constituents, and Alex got shot in the face.

Happy listening!

Know Your F@#%ing Opponent: Arizona Cardinals


After a brief hiatus, KYFO is back on what we’ll call a Wolf Grey Friday. This week’s Sunday Night Football showdown pits your Seattle Seahawks against the mildly-hated Arizona Cardinals. Know them, learn them, loathe them.

There’s a new sheriff in town. And he looks like an aging version of Ralphie from A Christmas Story.

Bruce Arians is the type of progressive thinker who transcends the game of football. He is to the NFL as the inimitable Joe Maddon is to Major League Baseball. Just look at him. Even if you know nothing about his philosophy, you can tell by his trendy eyewear that stat nerds will be whacking off to every decision he makes until the next bespectacled Kangol-hat-sporting savant comes along. Arians understands all the advanced metrics and really, really gets it because JUST LOOK AT THOSE HORN-RIMMED GLASSES, YOU NEANDERTHALS!!!

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Know Your F@#%ing Opponent: Cincinnati Bengals

17Happy Blue Friday, 12s, and welcome once again to another installment of Know Your [Bad Word] Opponent. This week we bring to you the least exciting undefeated team in football, the Cincinnati Bengals. Enjoy.

If you’re a child of the ’90s, as I am, you may remember going to pizza parlors throughout your youth and depositing quarters into machines that dispensed fun, enjoyable crap.  You put a quarter in, you spun a handle, and crap came out. Think of all the things you would never need, the things you couldn’t pawn off at your mother’s garage sale for a nickel. These were the very things kids like you and I were getting out of the veritable money pits polluting the entryways of Godfather’s, Shakey’s, Azteca, Red Robin, and more. Sticky hands, super balls, flimsy keychains made in China — a plethora of junk that could entertain a group of 10-year-olds for two or three hours, at most.

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Know Your F@#%ing Opponent: Detroit Lions


The bluest of Fridays to all 12 of you reading this! We’ve reached Week Four of the NFL season, and this week’s Seahawks opponent you need to know about is… the Detroit Lions.

Golden Tate is back! The guy who is absolutely, unequivocally, 100-percent responsible for Russell and Ashton Wilson’s divorce is returning to Seattle this weekend to wreck some homes, jack a few doughnuts, and maybe make a catch or two.

What? Don’t pretend like you weren’t consumed by the Golden-Ashton rumors. They may be silly. They may be unsubstantiated. They may not even be true. But don’t deny it: you were sucked into the juiciness like a 40-year-old single woman on Bachelor night.

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Know Your F@#%ing Opponent: Chicago Bears


Hello 12th People, and welcome to another Blue Friday. Today marks the third installment of our weekly preview on the Seahawks’ 2015 opponents. Our subject on this particular Friday: the Chicago Bears.

The Chicago Bears. My god, are they bad. This might very well be the worst team in the NFL, which may come as a shock to some of you since it wasn’t that long ago the Bears were actually decent. But man oh man, have they found ways to make themselves shitty the past couple seasons.

Let’s start from the top.

Following the 2012 campaign, the Bears fired head coach Lovie Smith, who didn’t totally suck. Rather than hire a better version of Smith to lead them, Chicago panicked and snagged Marc Trestman from the CFL. That’s right, Canada. They hired a quarterbacks guru from football’s minor leagues and expected it to work out. Naturally, it did not.

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Karate Emergency Episode 2.3: Pulling Back the Curtain


Kam Chancellor is back! But what does it mean for the Seahawks? And how about the 12th Man? Will all the #BlockedByKam fans be vindicated on Twitter? We investigate this and more.

In other news, we check in on Kelly’s dating life and the amazing Zack Morris-esque feat she pulled off on Friday. Plus a little venting on the Chinese president and a news story straight from the Steve Sarkisian school of expense reporting.

Karate Emergency, episode 3: Check it out!