As someone who generally tries to avoid panicky situations, I find it very amusing that all the people who were on the Mariners’ bandwagon not five days ago are now jumping off like Eddie Griffin is behind the wheel. (Eddie Griffin, the deceased former NBA player who was once pulled over and caught masturbating to porn on his built-in DVD player while also intoxicated. Not Eddie Griffin the comedian. Though talk about your worst case of mistaken identity ever if you’re the other Eddie Griffin.)
Observe this exchange of comments from the Facebook page of 710 ESPN radio hosts Brock Huard and Mike Salk (and just note that all these comments were delivered in the midst of Friday night’s game against the Rangers):
Brock And-Salk: Not hitting against underrated A’s in huge Oakland park is one thing, it’s another in Texas against a guy just back from japan!
Fan #1: very pathetic and dissapointing.
Fan #2: But, but they have the most awsome-est defense ever! They don’t need any bats because of their awesome defense! The M’s will find a way to win every game 0-0! (or so says USSMariner)
Fan #1: oh yeah, pitching and defense. thats been oh so impressive so far, haha
Me, trying to lighten the mood: Japan is highly underrated.
Fan #3: Jack Z better get on his phone and find us a bat otherwise Our season is going to be over before we see may [abrupt ending]
Fan #4: we need like 3 bats. and also put figgins at leadoff and make ichiro do nothing but bunt behind him until he pulls is head out of his you know what.
Fan #1: looks like the only thing we dont need is a centerfielder and an ace
Fan #4: [Fan #1] you hit it right on the head. i bet felix is regretting signing that extension.
Fan #1: This is just embarassing
Aside from the fact that most of these people can’t spell or form a sentence in English, it’s pretty funny that they’re all so down about this team at this point in time.
Seriously, people. Is Stan Van Gundy in charge here? There’s no need to panic just yet. We’re five games into the season. It’s clearly not over. We could still hypothetically go 158-4. That’s not so bad. Worse things have happened.
Our most highly touted offseason acquisition (Cliff Lee, in case there’s any debate) has yet to appear on the active roster, our second baseman (Chone Figgins, in case you’re just not aware) is a notoriously slow starter, and we have yet to play a home game. Keep in mind that this ballclub is perfectly tailored to Safeco Field. Let’s at least reserve judgment until we get home.
People around here just like to find things to get down about so they can be more social. Plus, when things are going well, it’s tougher to be cynical. I get that. We all do. Seattleites might be some of the most intelligent individuals in America, but they sure enjoy being cynics. Like the M’s starting the season slow is your end-all, be-all or something. Like you still won’t go out and see Hot Tub Time Machine because your life is over and done with now. Like you’ll go on a hunger strike, or move to Siberia, or quit your job because the Mariners lost a couple games. Right. I totally see those things happening.
Give it time, folks. If we need another bat, we’ll get another bat. If we need another arm, we’ll get another arm. This regime doesn’t sit on their thumbs all season long like the Bavasi Dynasty once did. Jackie Z. will take action when action needs to be taken. I’m not worried. Don’t listen to the pessimists.
And enjoy your weekend. It’s supposed to be sunny. Get out and do something. Peace.