Unhappy Fat Guy Thinks You Suck

Rob Sims hates you.


Assuming you live in Seattle, that is.

The ex-Seahawks offensive lineman was introduced as the newest member of the Detroit Lions today, and he had some choice words for his former city:

“This (Detroit) is a football town. Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Detroit. I mean, that’s football. Football and cars. This is more of what I’m accustomed to. Out there (in Seattle) the stars are Bill Gates and Paul Allen and the people that run Boeing. This here is what being in the NFL is supposed to be about, (standing) up here at the mic talking to reporters and stuff. In Seattle, it’s not like that. It’s drinking coffee, sittin’ down and chit-chatting. This is a change, but it’s a change that I’ve been looking forward to.”

Now clearly Sims is bitter about his divorce with the Seahawks. But why take it out on the fans who supported his useless fat ass over the past three years?

Look here, Robbie. Is it our fault you can’t hold a block? Is it our fault you can’t stay healthy? Is it our fault you haven’t put forth the effort to be the best player you can be? Because let’s be honest with ourselves here. I would wager that if you’re upset with the Seahawks, it’s because you didn’t give 100% of yourself to the team. Did you, Rob? The answer, of course, is no.

I will agree with you on one thing. There are a ton of people in and around Seattle who enjoy their coffee and like to chit-chat. Those are the same people who didn’t care when the Sonics left and continue to vote the same politicians into office simply because they have the letter “D” next to their name.

But you and I both know that those people aren’t sports fans, Rob. They’re not part of the 12th Man that supported you unconditionally in spite of your inconsistencies. They’re part of that sad faction of cynics who hate the world because they didn’t get picked for teams on the playground at recess.

Fact is, Rob, had you never said anything bad about Seattle, we’d remember you as a good guy who got hurt and couldn’t put it all together during his time here.

But you did say bad things about Seattle, and unfortunately that changes everything.

Instead, we’ll only recall your parting verbal shots and the fact that you weren’t just inconsistent, you were lazy, unwilling, and incapable of getting the job done.

It’s a sad reality when your old team doesn’t want you, Rob. But this is a business, and if you can’t handle that, then maybe you should give up your enormous salary and get a real job, like the rest of us. No need to sabotage your reputation because you’re a little upset.

Enjoy Detroit.

9 thoughts on “Unhappy Fat Guy Thinks You Suck”

  1. i actually thought rob sims had potential to be a great player and i thought he was a good guy, but after hearing his comments, he can go fuck himself.

  2. Seriously, do people that just sit around sipping coffee and chit chatting contribute to argueably the two loudest venues in all of football?!? Maybe some of them – when the time is right. I do not know why some fans were so enamored with this fella. He was a marginal pass blocker and almost worthless run blocker (to my untrained eye…). After hearing all of this from his lips, maybe there is a reason he didn’t reach his potential -> HE IS TOO DUMB!!! Not bitter here, but he can eat this Hawks and Huskies fan’s ass!

  3. He went to Ohio State, I can’t say I ever expected much from him. Douchery is an intricate part of the Buckeyes culture

  4. “Football town” is about the fans, not the team. But it does show his douchebaggery that he’s willing to lie about the Seattle fans he played (underperformed) IN FRONT OF for eight games a season. Now if he were to rip Mariners fans as idiots who only care about the computer hidden ball game and are upset that John Olerud isn’t on the team anymore, that would be completely understandable.

  5. Oh he went to Ohio State. That explains a lot. I disagree that there is a Democrat/Apathy correlation with regards to the Sonics. Welcome to King County. 90% of the people here are blue and there are tons of pissed off people regardless of political affiliation. Come on!

  6. Excuse me Rob? Seattle not a football town? Seattle one Superbowl appearance, Detroit ZERO, and only nine playoff appearances in the last forty years!

  7. I also disagree with the Democrat/Sonic apathy assertion. Sure there are a few holier-than-thou Nick Licata voters, but there are plenty of true-blue voters who are pissed the Sonics are gone. And although I’m not a coffee drinker (I like to chit-chat over beers?) I’m sure there are plenty of coffee drinkers who are true Sonics fans.. hopefully they steer clear of Starbucks, though.

  8. Ronald and Craig are focused on the wrong part of this article. Let me clear something up for you: Of course there are Democrats that are upset the Sonics left. End of discussion there. Please recommence discussion about how much of an idiot Rob Sims is. Carry on…

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