The Rant Post

Quiet everyone! An old man is talking.

Rather than bring the hammer down with a handful of articles venting about any number of sports-related topics, I’ve decided to combine all my little gripes into one giant rant post.

Here are the things currently bugging the hell out of me:

Tom Watson’s comments on Tiger Woods

I don’t really like Tiger Woods. He’s fun to watch golf on the back nine of a nail-biting tournament, I suppose, but I’ve never found myself rooting for the guy, per se.

Which is why you would think I’d appreciate Tom Watson’s recent comments on the embattled golf superstar. Take a look at what Watson had to say:

“I’ll let the cat out of the bag. Tiger has to take ownership of what he has done. He must get his personal life in order. I think that’s what he’s trying to do. And when he comes back, he has to show some humility to the public.

I would come out and I would do an interview with somebody and say, ‘You know what? I screwed up. And I admit it. I am going to try to change. I am trying to change. I want my wife and family back.’

I feel that he has not carried the same stature that other great players that have come along like Jack (Nicklaus), Arnold (Palmer), Byron Nelson, the Hogans, in the sense that there was language and club throwing on the golf course. You can grant that of a young person that has not been out here for a while. But I think he needs to clean up his act and show the respect for the game that other people before him have shown.”

Okay, let’s break this down.

The first two paragraphs of Watson’s diatribe are legitimate. If he wants to go there and weigh in on Tigergate a few weeks late then fine, whatever.

In paragraph three, however, the senile senior citizen in Watson emerges and we’re left wondering why we ever rooted for this guy in last year’s U.S. Open.

Why Watson feels the need to kick a man when he’s down is beyond me. All that garbage in the final paragraph could have been stated months ago, long before Tiger ever had these marital problems.

Clearly, these are issues that Watson has always had with Woods’ character, and in villainous fashion the old man has decided to air the dirty laundry at a time when Tiger is more or less defenseless.

Not that Tiger Woods is worthy of our sympathy at a time like this, but Tom Watson shouldn’t feel the need to capitalize on someone else’s downfall. Why not take a shot at Haiti while you’re at it, Tom. I hear they’re having some problems, too.

710 ESPN Seattle’s overuse of audio quip clips

This:

That’s basically what 710 is responsible for perpetuating.

For God’s sake, you’re not Bumblebee from Transformers.

Everyone’s concern with Tim Tebow’s image

It seems like everyone — media and fans alike — is sharing concern for Tim Tebow’s image these days.

Tebow, if you haven’t heard, will be appearing in a controversial ad during the Superbowl that essentially urges viewers to be pro-life.

The fact is, 50% of people out there won’t agree with Tebow’s message. And because of that, Tebow, unlike many star athletes, will become less marketable as a brand name in the process.

Unlike such “brand” athletes as Michael Jordan and Peyton Manning, to name two, Tebow is actually going out on a limb and expressing his personal beliefs publicly. He’s damaging his own reputation in the process, but at least we know he’s human.

Forget whether you agree or disagree with what Tebow is selling. Wouldn’t you rather see more athletes as real people? People that actually have opinions and share them? Because I would. Even if what the guy is saying doesn’t resonate with me.

And who really cares if Tebow damages his “image” or not? I don’t. Hell, if Tim Tebow wants to hook it up with Lindsay Lohan and start snorting crack, that’s fine by me. It’s his life, and I don’t really give a rat’s ass about the guy in the first place. Neither should you.

So let’s all band together and take a vow. We will not care about Tim Tebow’s image. Agreed? Fantastic.

The use of the term “relieved of his/her duties” when a coach is terminated

I read this headline online today: Clippers to relieve Dunleavy of coaching duties.

Right, like he’s so relieved.

I’m sure that’s how the front office explained Mike’s termination to him, as well.

“Hey, Mike, good news! We’re relieving you of your coaching duties. What a relief, huh?!”

Yeah, I’m sure there are no more stresses in Mike Dunleavy’s life now that you’ve fired him.

Perhaps the only real relief he feels is his newfound dissociation with the worst franchise in the history of sports. Other than that, it’s gotta be a crappy day to be that guy.

The overuse of “WhoDat”

I’m rooting for the Saints in the Superbowl.

But I’d be rooting for them with greater fervor if I hadn’t heard “WhoDat” about 200 times a day for the past two weeks.

In fact, dependent on how many times I hear that dumbass phrase on Sunday, I might change my allegiance.

WhoDat, WhoDat, WhoDat…it’s like watching only the annoying parts of The Waterboy (which, undoubtedly, someone will joke is the whole thing).

2 thoughts on “The Rant Post”

  1. After seeing all these Saints fan lately (especially the guy who shot up his TV), I’m beginning to think the The Waterboy was a lot more accurate that I ever imagined.

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