30 Reasons To Hate The University Of Oregon

harringtonBecause everyone could use another reason to despise Whoregon.

30. Chip Kelly. What a smug bastard.

29. The mascot. Even he can’t stay out of trouble.

28. Steve Prefontaine. There was something not quite right about that malnourished hippie.

27. Mac Court. An ugly, disease-infested building.

26. Animal cruelty charges. Duck on duck violence. We make an example out of Michael Vick, but give these guys a free pass. That’s messed up.

25. Their plethora of draft busts. If you’re a fan of a pro sports franchise and your team drafts a Duck, you might as well mail in the next five years.

24. Akili Smith. He was plain horrible. Just horrible. Franchise-murdering horrible.

23. This monstrosity. Scaring your children since 2007.

22. Richie Incognito, aka the guy who was sleazy enough to get into Oregon, but too sleazy to play.

21. Luke Bellotti. The part-time kicker and full-time drunk son of ex-head coach and current AD Mike Bellotti.

20. The rape and pillage of Donald Duck. It’s actually worse than this. Much, much worse.

19. The cheerleaders. They’re fun to look at, but they’re basically fembots. Rumor has it that if you get with any of them they snap your penis off and then eat you after the sex, not unlike spiders.

18. Mark Few. He’s an Oregon alum, ya know.

17. Onterrio “The Whizzinator” Smith. You already know about his pee-pee machine scandal. You may not know that he just got arrested again.

16. These jerseys.

15. Daniel Levitin. Who? He’s a musician and Oregon alum who doubles as the sound designer for Chris Isaak. So it’s his fault that Chris Isaak is making music.

14. Second-hand Lukes. Take your pick: Jackson or Ridnour. Either way, you’re extremely disappointed.

13. These jerseys.

12. Green and yellow. The colors of vomit and piss, respectively.

11. These jerseys.

10. Autzen Stadium. The gateway to hell. Satan plays his home games here.

9. These jerseys.

8. The city of Eugene. A place that, when viewed from space, is simply a black mark on the globe.

7. The whole shady Nike relationship. Everything about Phil Knight’s support for his alma mater seems wrong. And yet there’s nothing we can do to stop it. This must be how the FCC feels when Family Guy is broadcast.

6. The logo. An ‘O.’ That’s the best you could do? Your fans can’t even form the logo with their hands. They can do triangles, squares, rectangles, seemingly every other shape. But ask them to form an ‘O” and they proudly display something that vaguely resembles an ‘A’.

5. These jerseys.

4. Ernie Kent. From extramarital affairs in Mexico to just generally being an ass, there are thousands upon millions of reasons to despise Ernesto.

3. This guy and this guy.

2. Joey Harrington. Whether you’re from Seattle, Pullman, Corvallis, Palo Alto, Berkeley, Los Angeles, Tucson, Tempe, Detroit, Miami, Atlanta, or New Orleans, you know what I’m talking about.

1. The fans. Worst Fans in America. Hands down. From the iconic Pit Crew to the scum-of-the-earth alums that spew venomous taunts at opponents, there is little regard for human decency in and around the University of Oregon and no rhyme or reason for their behavior. Just bad breeding, I guess.

55 responses

  1. Oregon by 3 TDs…at least!

  2. I guess we can take back Unger and Reed then?

  3. LOL angry washington fan with too much time on his hands

  4. How about.. their blatant amnesia about football prior to the 1990’s. Football wasn’t invented when you started winning, Ducks!

    Let’s go Dawgs!

  5. Huck the Fuskies

    Lol pure hate. I swear reading this was like listening to a kid with down syndrome saying he is going to kick your ass. No matter how you try and defend yourself Husky fans, you will always be gayer then a 3 dollar bill.

  6. Typical Duck. Manages to offend handicapped persons, homosexuals, Husky fans, and three-dollar bills all in two sentences. What do you have against three-dollar bills, Duck?

  7. @Anonymous

    Take em…they smell like patchouli anyway. Go play bongos hippie, and cut your hair!

  8. My God!! Those quackers have the MOST obnoxious fans, winning isn’t enough for them they continue screaming the entire game NOOOO DON’T LET THEM SCORE! give it a rest. And the guy standing on the edge top level with the sombrero, get a grip the officials CANNOT hear you, what is the purpose of your sombrero? I thought that was to humiliate your basketball coach and his indiscretions, not something a duck fan should be wearing!

  9. I notice you’re suspiciously silent today. Can’t wait to read your recap of yesterday’s Massacre at Montlake, Alex.

  10. “Roboduck” or whatever he’s supposed to be called, was introduced in 2004 but I will admit it was a ridiculous idea (Evinced by the nearly instant rebuking). Walt Disney (friend to Len Casanova) personally designed that “rape” as you call it. Green and Yellow are bad colors? Where was this animosity towards the crayon box when Seattle still had an NBA franchise? And dissing Oregon for having an O for a logo…what is Washington’s logo??? My favorite: the whole hippie thing. I guess you’re ready to disown Jimmie Hendrix!

    When you re-post something like this next year maybe you could add, “Oregon has crushed Washington 6 years in a row.” What other reason does one need to hate a team?

    I was hoping UW was going to at least be competitive again but after rolling over like a good little doggy again this year, I guess us hippies are going to have to go back to the bongs and hope UW and the rivalry is relevant again next year.

    DUDE, GO DUCKS BRO!

  11. In case you run out of reasons to hate UO there are many more here: http://www.youtube.com/luddite333

  12. Love it! I’m from Oregon but go to OSU…..DUCKS suck….or should I call them Fucks!

  13. Does the University of Washington have a football team?

  14. not a relevant one they dont.

  15. This is the dumbest article I have ever read. The author is most likely a dog which I don’t even have to insult, they do it to themselves. Have some class asshole.

  16. WemakeVicklooknice

    Nice game against Arizona tonight. How is that Heisman hopeful working out for you? It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling to dig up a thread like this and realize how hard of a pounding we are going to lay on you again this year. Will it be a decade of losses against the Mighty Oregon? Looks likely. If we keep beating the dogs this badly someone might need to call PETA.

  17. hahahahahahahahhaa QQ haters

  18. Wow…After decades of being an underdog, the Ducks start winning and the haters come crawling out of the woodwork. Obviously this article was written by a “Dawg” fan with far too much time on his hands. What I find humorous is that Alex here can make fun of everything EXCEPT for the way the Ducks are playing. Face it pal, every team has asshole fans, even your precious pups.

    So with that being said, good luck at Autzen this Saturday. Your Dawgs better bring an army, seeing as how your QB, the Brady Quinn of the Pac 10, Locker, is out of commission. You might start having visions of the game last week when they got shutout by Stanford. Didn’t Oregon beat them?? Deja Vu all over again.

    You wanna talk smack about other teams? Try doing it when your team can actually back it up. GO DUCKS!!

  19. Im sorry seattle sports net… your quite ridiculous

  20. Sounds like jealousy to me…

  21. Sore looser is the only thing that comes to mind. You are a cliche’

  22. Your #1 describes you very well. Oh the humanity.

  23. I have been seeing these kinds of postings and smack talk for a long time.Husky fans are passionate about their team and have to put the Ducks down to make themselves fell better. In this decade Washington beat Oregon twice? So this natural NW rivalry has been anything but a rivalry in it’s true meaning. Oregon has dominated Washington this decade and will continue the annual “whipping post”till Kelly is gone or Sarkisian is gone or better schemes. Huskies will be mediocre for a long while. Enjoy basketball,your football team is baaaaaaddddd!

  24. […] note: EVERYBODY HATES OREGON! And here’s some additional reading material on the Ducks if you’re looking for a good […]

  25. Snoop Dogg’s son is planing on going to UO. Thats all the information needed to retort this article.

  26. Fuck You If You Dont Agree

    The only reason these fags had a 13-1 season is because they were in the Pac 10, how many more ranked teams were there like 1? If they woulda played in the SEC they would have lost to South Carolina, Arkansas, Auburn (again), LSU and maybe even Florida. Just because you thought you had a good team doesnt mean shit. So what if y’alls main man had 1600 yards rushing this season, Marcus Lattimore and Knile Davis would have ran 2000 plus yards in that bitch conference. Fuck Oregon fuck Oregon State fuck Washington fuck USC fuck whatever the hell you all think you got goin on up there.

  27. I am a pac 12 fan and i like every team in the conference with the exception of ucla and oregon. The only reasons i hate oregon is the asshole fans

  28. […] years ago, I wrote an article listing 30 Reasons to Hate the University of Oregon. To say it was one of the more polarizing pieces I’ve ever written would be an […]

  29. Haha funny washington still has the lead over the total number of wins over oregon by pretty large. So all you Oregon fans that think you guys have the better football team think again you little 7 win streak is nothing compared to us having 17 more wins over you guys. The oregons ducks used to be a joke they have never won any rose bowl or bcs so if i were you oregon fans i wouldn’t be bragging over your minor win streak.

  30. Not a UW fan. Hate the pac12. F@ck the ducks. I massacre at the hands of LSU wasn’t enough I don’t guess. You may get another shot at a sec team but I predict your cute little offense will suffer the outcome as the last 2 times…

  31. I get it… Beaver fans will spend more energy this week bashing the Ducks in any social media outlet than their football team will on the field. In the end, the result will be the same, the Beavers with a chance to foil the Ducks going to a BCS bowl, failing once again, and then rooting for whatever Big 10 team UO plays on New Year’s Day. All that said, show a little humanity Beavs and leave PREFONTAINE out of the discussion!

  32. I was recommended this blog by my cousin. I am no longer sure whether or not this submit is written through him as no one else recognise such exact approximately my problem. You’re amazing! Thanks!

  33. Huck the Fuskies :
    Lol pure hate. I swear reading this was like listening to a kid with down syndrome saying he is going to kick your ass. No matter how you try and defend yourself Husky fans, you will always be gayer then a 3 dollar bill.

    love it

  34. This is neither funny nor clever. Half of your “reasons” are the same reason. So maybe stick with a top 15 or 10. And you didn’t even mention the most obvious hater comments and/or scandals. Just poor writing. Not to mention another 8 of those reasons are awesome. Any team having our kind of Nike connection, uniforms and marketing would love it so you’re a giant hypocrite. Your comment about Autzen Stadium doesn’t even make any sense. Anyone who watches a game there is blown away and ESPN/BCS analysts describe it as electric and one of the loudest in the country. Our cheer leaders are consistently incredible and your statement is drenched in jealousy. I’m a Duck (obviously) but I can appreciate the flaws of my school (all schools have them). Your attempt to either be funny or even just hate, have failed…. Miserably.

  35. My wife and I live in Eugene, we are both Drs. We just moved here and will be leaving right away. The medical community gave us a lot of bonus money to move to Eugene, I can see why. Let me tell you, we thought it would be great to raise our children in a small town. Well, that might sound like a good idea, but, Eugene Oregon is a hell hole. First of all the University of Oregon is full of welfare liberals and professors who are bitter that they are not at the University of Washington or Stanford. The University of Oregon’s business department and faculty are highly useless. They produce unrecognized research and no formal business experience to speak of. Nike money will someday go away from their sad excuse for a sports program. I stopped buying Nike products when Nike started dumping money into such a rude classless sports program. I have never seen such a classless group of fans than those at Oregon. Furthermore, medical school, what medical school? Well, unlike the University of Washington, Stanford or UCLA, the University of Oregon does not have a medical school! Internationally, the University of Oregon has no respect for their natural science programs and their business programs will always be hindered by poor professors and the small worthless economy of Oregon and the worthless city of Eugene, if you dare call it a city. I have more respect for the schools of Oregon State and Washington State than I have for the University of Oregon. At least OSU and WSU acknowledge their geographic economic weaknesses and don’t try to be a school that they are not. OSU and WSU do the best they can with existing resources, they are not trying to keep up with the Jones like how the U of O tries to keep up with schools that are geographically gifted. Finally, I’ve never spoke with a group of professors with such poor self-esteem. I think it’s clear that they have a poor self-complex created from only being able to impress each other and not the larger academic community. In closing, I’d like to share that I’ve never seen a community of such sports fans and general folks who are so pissed off at the world. Face it, Eugene Oregon is a washed up timber community that is economically pissed off at the world. People who live in Eugene and are associated with the University of Oregon might be the most unfriendly group of people I have ever met.

  36. Man i love hearing posts like this as a duck fan. makes husky’s and beaver fans look petty come back and talk after you win something for once. it’s like hearing a boxer getting knocked the fuck out then trying to talk shit.
    last three years: three top bsc bowl games .
    three pac 12 titles.
    rose bowl champs.

    last three years: husky’s???????????????????????????????????????????

  37. Anonymous :
    My wife and I live in Eugene, we are both Drs. We just moved here and will be leaving right away. The medical community gave us a lot of bonus money to move to Eugene, I can see why. Let me tell you, we thought it would be great to raise our children in a small town. Well, that might sound like a good idea, but, Eugene Oregon is a hell hole. First of all the University of Oregon is full of welfare liberals and professors who are bitter that they are not at the University of Washington or Stanford. The University of Oregon’s business department and faculty are highly useless. They produce unrecognized research and no formal business experience to speak of. Nike money will someday go away from their sad excuse for a sports program. I stopped buying Nike products when Nike started dumping money into such a rude classless sports program. I have never seen such a classless group of fans than those at Oregon. Furthermore, medical school, what medical school? Well, unlike the University of Washington, Stanford or UCLA, the University of Oregon does not have a medical school! Internationally, the University of Oregon has no respect for their natural science programs and their business programs will always be hindered by poor professors and the small worthless economy of Oregon and the worthless city of Eugene, if you dare call it a city. I have more respect for the schools of Oregon State and Washington State than I have for the University of Oregon. At least OSU and WSU acknowledge their geographic economic weaknesses and don’t try to be a school that they are not. OSU and WSU do the best they can with existing resources, they are not trying to keep up with the Jones like how the U of O tries to keep up with schools that are geographically gifted. Finally, I’ve never spoke with a group of professors with such poor self-esteem. I think it’s clear that they have a poor self-complex created from only being able to impress each other and not the larger academic community. In closing, I’d like to share that I’ve never seen a community of such sports fans and general folks who are so pissed off at the world. Face it, Eugene Oregon is a washed up timber community that is economically pissed off at the world. People who live in Eugene and are associated with the University of Oregon might be the most unfriendly group of people I have ever met.

    the quickest way to make yourself look incredibly ignorant is to stereotype…didn’t think it was possible to fit this many into one paragraph. i feel sorry for your children…

  38. Anonymous :My wife and I live in Eugene, we are both Drs. We just moved here and will be leaving right away. The medical community gave us a lot of bonus money to move to Eugene, I can see why. Let me tell you, we thought it would be great to raise our children in a small town. Well, that might sound like a good idea, but, Eugene Oregon is a hell hole. First of all the University of Oregon is full of welfare liberals and professors who are bitter that they are not at the University of Washington or Stanford. The University of Oregon’s business department and faculty are highly useless. They produce unrecognized research and no formal business experience to speak of. Nike money will someday go away from their sad excuse for a sports program. I stopped buying Nike products when Nike started dumping money into such a rude classless sports program. I have never seen such a classless group of fans than those at Oregon. Furthermore, medical school, what medical school? Well, unlike the University of Washington, Stanford or UCLA, the University of Oregon does not have a medical school! Internationally, the University of Oregon has no respect for their natural science programs and their business programs will always be hindered by poor professors and the small worthless economy of Oregon and the worthless city of Eugene, if you dare call it a city. I have more respect for the schools of Oregon State and Washington State than I have for the University of Oregon. At least OSU and WSU acknowledge their geographic economic weaknesses and don’t try to be a school that they are not. OSU and WSU do the best they can with existing resources, they are not trying to keep up with the Jones like how the U of O tries to keep up with schools that are geographically gifted. Finally, I’ve never spoke with a group of professors with such poor self-esteem. I think it’s clear that they have a poor self-complex created from only being able to impress each other and not the larger academic community. In closing, I’d like to share that I’ve never seen a community of such sports fans and general folks who are so pissed off at the world. Face it, Eugene Oregon is a washed up timber community that is economically pissed off at the world. People who live in Eugene and are associated with the University of Oregon might be the most unfriendly group of people I have ever met.

    Wow, anyone who makes this many broad sweeping generalizations in one post about an entire community is nuts. I think its obvious why you didn’t fit in in Eugene. Not exactly sure where you will fit in, but I agree with the previous post, I feel very sorry for your children…:-(

  39. if someone from Oregon wrote this article about washington…or any team for that matter, id be very embarrased…i feel bad for level headed husky fans who appreciate a good rivalry…there is so much wrong about this article its insane.

  40. […] in Eugene, OR?? Seriously. Can you tell I’m not a fan? Want 30 more reasons to hate U of O? Here ya go.  LOL. Sexy. […]

  41. the officating in the national champion champion game was worse than in superbowl xl! a husky is a type of, a dog a bitch and means all huskies fans are all bitches

  42. how can you all hate ducks more than the cougars, you in our instate rivals? and be the way sec is overrated on any given year they only 2 or 3 teams that rank in the top 25

  43. I like how you sit here and call the fans scum of the earth and say that their acts are unjustified yet you are sitting here writing a sny claim of bullshit facts that have nothing to do with the football team of today and your prejudice against them. This article right here is what is wrong with football fans across the nation.

  44. Guess what duck fans and beavers fans have in common ? Neither went to uofo… Ducks fans are trashy disgusting losers . Boise state rapes u and all u can say is they are only good cause they play bad teams lol so are u saying ur a bad team ? They whooped you bitches

  45. I’m not a fan of either school (I attend SOU) and I don’t watch a ton of college football, but I must admit this article is a bit trashy. I really like Eugene or U of O, but this article has no class.

  46. I meant to say *don’t like Eugene.

  47. For Husky fans.. I guess it’s been hard to lose the last 10 years.. but if you’re good at something stick with it.

  48. I lived in Oregon for 13 years and can honestly say that the worst thing about the state by far is the arrogant U. of O. fans. They think their school is God’s gift to the world, when in fact it is the sphincter of North America.

  49. All about them Wildcats!! Let’s go Zona baby!!!

  50. Ha! Ducks lost to Stanford yesterday. Suck it Ducks.

  51. LMAO Jeff and Steph, I like how you both feel sorry for the children he never mentioned.

    I feel very sorry for your children…:-(

    i feel sorry for your children…

  52. You have 30 reasons to hate the U of O, I have one reason to hate you… 1. You hate the ducks. Fuck you

  53. This is dumb. Everyone’s got their skeletons, so bashing individuals is just poor taste…you’d have to bash everyone else to be fair. Also, eugene rules, RESPECTIVELY. Compared to SO MANY THOUSANDS of other “black dots” on this disgusting map of ‘Murica. Stupid ass country. Eugene should secede and leave all you idiots behind.

  54. The Dr who wrote the long post nailed it! Of coarse there’s going to be idiots that won’t to hear the truth tho. I feel so good for his children! They get to grow up with a dad who’s ho est and not completely delusional! You guys are in denial! The doc hit it right on the spot and of coarse its going to hurt. Your in denial! Eugene if filled with pot smoking burnouts who truly are miserable and pissed off at the world. I like how an actual dr talk about the medical field here. Once again hitting right on the money. Miserable staff and doctors that will send you back and forth, never sitting down and actually doing a little research, just kicking you off to the next guy. And Obamacare.. What a joke!!!!!!! Lets jus throw away trillions more on top of the 18 trillion we are in debt by already. Few years ago all these stupid demos had Obama stickers all over there car.. Well what happened Eugene???? Were you a person who took the sticker off or were you so embarrassed you had to go buy a new car???? Lol!!! I hope this is the “change ” you were looking for! No wonder your all so pissed off and in denial.. And the idiots that walk and ride around all day looking for people with their leash off the dog! This is my biggest pet peeve. I walk my dog everyday never with a leash and never will. Ya I know “its the law here.” Well jackass its the law everywhere but I’ve been all over America and Eugene is the only place where people bug you about a leash. I’m never around people with her leash off either. Out in the middle of feild with no one around but here comes some lady or old man making a b line for me walking like there FBI or something. Its actually really funny at first but after it keeps happening it starts to get under your skin. Miserable people with nothing better to do then trying to make you miserable as well. Its like they get some kind of high out of it! Well bring it on Eugene! Last guy got kicked off his bike and I threw his backpack in the creek. Last lady was yelled at and told to mind her own business. She started crying on the phone to the police about my attitude and the dog was off the leash. She waited for 45 mins for the cops to come before flipping me off and peeling out of the parking lot! Guess they weren’t coming!! Cops see me all the time with the leash off. Do they anything. NO. Once a woman cop said my dog was very well mannered and asked its age but that’s it! Anywo I was reading this and have wanting to vent. My next step is putting bumper stickers on everybody’s car in Eugene and Springfield. It would say something along the lines of Eugene sucks and your in denial! Iike I said I live here. The duck fans are idiots because that is the only thing in the world they can look forward to: watching a game while being themselves- little obnoxious preschoolers, hugging complete strangers over a good catch. Where’s the love when driving your car like a complete moron?? I’ve smoked bud before and I’m not against it at all but Eugene needs to lay the f off it for a while. 2/3 of the city is in some kind of heavy daze and the other 1\3 is depressed and mad at the world. I look forward to hearing some idiots reply to this. I will read your delusional replys with my friends and family who also live in eugene/ Springfield who feel the same way as me. I bet your wondering why I don’t just move.. Cause I’m gonna turn this shithole of a town around and I have roots here. I will be the thorn in Eugenes hippy delusional side!!!!!!

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